Title: Insanely Sane
Site: Writers Strike - VST http://writer-strike-vst.blogspot.com/
It has a good play on words that can attract a reader. It's unique, however some people use it but for different purposes (for love). Your choice of genre was different to the norm.
You can clearly see the character's personality with the poster. How their minds are damaged with the broken glass. The use of text effects is good too. As for the background, the image doesn't cause harm for the eyes. It is clear and can make the text be easily read.
Outstanding uses of quotes at the end; captivating the reader instantly. There is a good, detailed summary about the plot of where your oneshot is heading. There's barely and spelling or grammar mistakes that I could detect, it's simply flawless! It is by far really unique since I actually had goosebumps since I'm not a fan of this certain genre, but it is a very intriguing start!
Your plot flows smoothly throughout the whole story. Nothing is sticking out, creating loose ends and such. You didn't try to rush anything; which some people tend to do when they're creating a oneshot. There isn't anything that's causing you to slow down either! Well done~! It is an original plot and I can barely see anything out of the ordinary. I'm pretty much repeating myself, but honestly? It's good. All twists flowed together to be unravelled at a latter part in the oneshot.
I don't see many 'insane' fanfics out there. They're all focusing on common themes such as rom-com and dark romance. I also find it unique how you made the ending sad but happy. There was a twist in that way. With the way on how you worded human ignorance seemed like a wake-up call. As well as being an original piece of fiction, there can be some sort of truth in the words you've put together. Really well put, makes the reader question what they believe in. I believe only good authors are able to accomplish that!
The twists untangled themselves at the end. The speed wasn't too fast. And I repeat again, people writing oneshots usually speed up how they write. Though with your pace it was well balanced.
Everything is great, but just one time that is really minor. I can't see any errors but this. And that is that instead of using '1' you should write it out as a word 'one'. Yes, that may be slightly picky. However, that's what I learned in English so I supposed that's how it goes. Everything else? Great. Your tenses are in the right place, as was the vocabulary you used! ^^
I have nothing against Kim Jaejoong, but I find that he's slightly overrated regarding fanfic main male characters. I would say try using other men out there for a future fanfic who isn't in the limelight as much. Of course this may lessen the popularity of your story. But it's worth a shot~! As well as the main original character. Thank you. Lots of people are using the 'reader' as one of the characters. Sure that may be great for the reader. However, it isn't proper English grammar. You've managed to create your own character, moulding her into what you want her to be.
Writing Style: 10/10
Your style is easily read. Nothing that can make my eyes twitch whatsoever.
Overall Enjoyment: 5/5
1 point: It's my first experience reading this sort of genre. I must admit, when I first saw your forewords I was worried that I would not be able to sleep. But as I read onward... I realized the true meaning of what you were trying to get across.
1 point: Your writing style is really advanced. I wish all writers could write as detailed as you can. But that wouldn't create originality!
1 point: It was a REALLY good read. I enjoyed every bit of it.
1 point: The epilogue for Jaejoong was a really good way of showing how both characters loved each other, but didn't get the chance.
1 point: Really good graphics and the unique genre that you used. I barely see it come up.
**I feel like I've been really generous! But your story was really great! I loved every bit of it!!