Wife 4 Hire [review]

Fanfic Title: Wife 4 Hire
Author: afhilangie
Fanfic Url: http://winglin.net/fanfic/4hire/
Reviewer: purple_lilly @ccmunchers.blogspot.com

Story Title: (4/5)
The title totally shows what in the plot. You could've put 'Wife For Hire' instead, but 'Wife 4 Hire' is better. If you wanted to get the correct grammar way, it would've been 'For'. Apart from that, I really liked it.
Appearance: (9/10)
Gui Gui looked just like how she was characterized. Good use of choosing the photo. As for Aaron, it suited him, since he was a businessman. The poster really was eye-catching. I REALLY did want to read it, not as a reviewer, but just as a general reader myself. The background was great. But, the yellow font, I kind of found it too bright. Overall, I really liked the appearance of your story. Very very attractive.
Forewords/ Introduction: (9/10)
The quotes you added, really made me want to read it in the quickest time possible. The vocabulary used was higher than what I use. I had to look at the dictionary to find out what most of the words you included meant! Your introduction of the characters, was simple and straight to the point. Not an endless essay that was longer than the fanfic itself. But I couldn't help but want to know more about Gui Gui and Aaron. . It explained that Gui Gui would leave Aaron at some point, but not that they'd pretend to be 'boyfriend girlfriend' beforehand. It was really captivating! The only advice I can give, is to make your introduction, not as detailed as what you had put. It gave a little bit extra away.
Plot: (19/20)
Congratulations! Only a mark away from getting a full mark! The chapters were captivating, like your forewords. I knew something was going to happen, since you said Gui Gui was to leave in the forewords, but as I read more about it, I began to wonder, how is Gui Gui to leave? Its near the end, and she hasn't left yet. It turned out she left and the chapter before the final one. And came back to him in the final chapter. I've never read a plot like this yet. For me, it was unique, since it was my first time reading a plot like this. But somehow, I expected Gui Gui to have come back to Aaron. They always do. Maybe you could have just let her stay away from him, for a year, and then they'd get back together, however what you put, was good also. As for Trina, her character, was like the third wheel. Holding Aaron away from Gui Gui. Good use for Trina there. The only things you've done wrong is your tense. Instead of has, you put have, or instead of sit, you put sat. I know, it may not matter, but I got quite confused, is it past? Or present? This was the only thing that was wrong, that kept getting repeated every chapter I read. At least one word wrong, causing one point to fall from an all perfect 20/20.

Characterization: (10/10)
The characters stuck to whatever you said they were. Well, Gui Gui changed, since she used to be embarrassed to be a dancer, however that changed gradually. As for Trina, I thought she had left the first time I read about her, but she just had to come back and ruin GuiLun. This showed that Trina certainly DIDN'T change in any way. Although a minor character, Trina made Gui Gui run away, causing Aaron to find her, and when he did find her, they confessed his love, meaning, without Trina's hurtful words, GuiLun wouldn't have been together. So good use of characters!
Creativity/Originality: (8/10)
Sure, this is the first fanfic I've read with this type of plot, however, I always knew that Gui Gui would end up living with Aaron and everything would be a 'happily ever after'. The thing is, that this always happens! I get annoyed for some reason, yet all giddy. Sure, you could've put more twists. I've noticed that GuiLun is a very popular variety of characters in winglin. However, many of them, I haven't read before, since I mostly read Korean with just a little Taiwanese.

Spelling/Vocabulary/Grammar/Punctuations: (9/10)
There is nothing wrong with any of your spellings, vocabulary (which is really good!) or punctuations. But the grammar, not so good, but not so bad either. The only thing is, that, like what I said before. Your tenses were wrong. But! Everything else seems to be good.
Flow: (5/5)
It was just the right type of flow. However, I kind of had the feeling that you ended it a bit too fast. But throughout the whole story, it wasn't slow, nor fast (?). Just the right pace.
Writing Style: (15/15)
The story is very organized! I didn't get confused at all, the speech was clearly set out, and so were the paragraphs.

Overall Enjoyment: (5/5)
I laughed, I felt sad. This story surely had quite an impact on me. Made me...want to read EVERY story you've ever written.
Sub-total: 93/100
Bonus: (5/5)
I've only ever read 2-3 GuiLun fanfics, and thanks to this, I may be reading much more. I also really enjoyed it! Such a great plot! Well done, afhilangie!!!!
Total: 98/100

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This is  one of my reviews from CCM.