U Kiss Kibum and You [REVIEW]

Title: U Kiss Kibum and You
Link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/24332/u-kiss-kibum-and-you-kibum-ukiss
Reviewer: Stephie
Site requested from: http://3vanillalove3.blogspot.com

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Title: 2/5
It doesn't really seem to grab onto the reader. Something you could've done was put a quote or something. But to be honest, it seems pretty boring. The reader may know whose in the story from it, but that should be in the tags. What you could've put might've been "How I met Kibum"? Or something like that. Something that makes the reader intrigued and interested.

Poster/Background: 10/10
The poster is fuzzy, however even so, you can still see the U-Kiss members and Kibum. The title isn't a colour that clashes with the pictures. And the single quote is something that picks up the reader's curiosity.

Forewords: 10/15
Forewords are usually an introduction to the story. What you could've done was put some quotes, describe the characters and in a way that isn't too obvious tell the plot of the story - not straightforwardly like, "this story is about love between two characters" but something like, "Unkown love for a language." maybe.

Although, what you put in your forewords was very detailed and well put :)

Plot: 15/15
Your story isn't completed yet, so I'm not sure on how the story may flow or not. The plot seems unique since how it started off by her just getting a call and how things progressed from there. You've got good twists to change it from all the other stories about a girl living with idols, slowly falling in love with one of them.

Originality: 14/15
It's an original plot because of your twists, however I had to degrade just one point because it was a common 'girl-lives-with-boy-they-fall-in-love' plot. More twists and unexpected turns would definitely make it the full 15/15. Though, since it isn't finished there may be more to come which may make me want to take back my words XD!

Flow: 2/5
I feel that it is going to fast. How she had suddenly been taken from her home to go and live with U-Kiss. If you somehow made things slightly slower, the flow would be just right. It's like she was kidnapped. Of course if that was a real life situation the first thing when you're kidnapped is to call your parents or police - but THIS IS U-KISS! So, its an understanding that she didn't want to leave ^-^.

Grammar/spelling/vocabulary: 8/10
Your grammar is good, and I suppose only a few typos are what make some of your spellings wrong. Try re-reading what you've typed so that you don't get any typos which may confuse the reader.

The thing is though, for speech you use (') this. (') is only used when someone is quoting something or if someone has thoughts - occasionally people may use (*) though. The proper way of using speech would be ("). Yes, you may have to press the shift key, and it may take longer, but it is the proper way of vocabulary. You may sometimes see it in books, and I don't know why it's like that, but the proper way is (').

Characterization: 10/10
Sadly, there aren't much U-Kiss fanfictions that are common. Sure, there are ones with U-Kiss featured as cameos and such, but not a lot of them as the main characters. As well as that, you didn't stick with ~~~~ / ------ as your 'reader' you actually gave it a name. Which may be confusing so it's good that you did 'Koral'.

Writing style: 10/10
You writing style is good. It's written as if the mind of the girl was always uncaring but when there's boys around may tend to get shy. (REALLY ACCURATE! XD!) I was easily able to understand what you meant to put and didn't wonder what you meant. So FULL MARKS TO YOU!~

Overall enjoyment: 10/10
Honestly, I spazzed and giggled at your stories! I'm looking forward to your updates, and thanks for requesting @ Vanilla love!

Total: 91/105

Extra: 5/5
IT'S AN AWESOME FANFIC! I love the twists, and how you put together your words. If it was a comedy fanfic, you'd be awesome at it!